Where to begin...
I have a great life. I have to start with that. I'm very thankful for all I have. I have a good job with great people. I have a fantastic group of friends. I own my own home. My family is once again healthy (knock on wood). But I also thought I'd be married with children by now. I know the old saying, if you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans. Well, he must have laughed hysterically at my plans since I was so far off. However, here's the thing. I am so glad I was wrong in those plans. Maybe not in the length of time, but the time I have spent alone in the last several years has been so incredibly important to me as a person. I know many people who jump from relationship to relationship or freak out when they don't have a significant other and it's because they don't know how to be alone. I'm comfortable by myself, sometimes too much. I learned to like myself and the faults I have. I admitted I needed help to overcome my trust issues and I have no qualms about saying how much it has helped me to talk it out with someone who knows what they are doing. I've gone out on dates from time to time over the years, but there was always something wrong with the guys and now I know I just wasn't ready to date. I was still holding on to past issues. I'm finally ready to date. I don't need someone to complete me because I'm a whole person by myself. I'm ready to find someone who will make my life even better than it already is.
Unfortunately, I'm finding that dating in your 30's is a bit rough. Life would have been so much easier if I would have found someone to marry during college when there was a plethora guys to choose from, but my stupid ass didn't spread my wings then. I work in a profession that is 98% women. Most of my friends only have married male friends or ones they wouldn't set me up with. In other words it's difficult to meet men. So I've resorted to online dating. We'll see how this goes. Until next time....
*Names will be changed to protect the innocent.
